This fall is the season of fantasy

The hardest part about reading The Silmarillion is knowing all the names of the people and locations. It feels like each major character has at least three different names I'm supposed to remember (because they're all used interchangeably) but my brain is just not made to remember that stuff. I'm barely holding on by a thread! Also, I really struggle with caring for a lot of these characters because I feel like I don't know them. The best chapters are the ones that dive into one or two characters, build up their relationship, and show how they impact the lore. But those chapters don't come often enough, so I find myself bored and annoyed, especially when I hear about a character but don't get any investment in who they are. This book really isn't what I was expecting and I can't help but be somewhat disappointed. I understand that this is different from The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings trilogy, but I wish it was more like them. It's difficult for me to stay interested. But I'm still reading, still checking the Tolkien Gateway and all the references in the back of the book. I'm nearly done with it so I plan to finish it today. Mostly because I bought Magic's Pawn by Mercedes Lackey a few days ago and it should be arriving on Tuesday. I want to start reading it immediately! The only Mercedes Lackey book I've read was a library book, it was Winds of Fate, which I really enjoyed. I want to read more about magic so I decided to read this early trilogy. Mercedes Lackey's book is what inspired me to begin working on my own fantasy world. Which I'm becoming more invested in working on! I've started writing a bit for a character, figuring out the timeline, and the languages of all the races in this world. I plan to continue working on it for the next week while I'm on break.

My mental health has been pretty stable, I would say. I've been taking all my medications on time, I could stand to go outside more, I'm interacting with friends and family. I've even been working on a creative output even when it's difficult! I talk to my therapist later this week but I don't think I'll have much to talk about! Recently the only thing that's been on my mind is my anxiety coming and going, my boredom, and trying to be creative while reading and writing. Other than those things, my mind has been blank. I'm not really worrying about what other people think or psychosis or my past experiences. I feel very content in who I am right now, happy with my life and thankful for all of the support I have in my life. Without the support of my family I couldn't imagine how much worse my life would be.